Medications
by CaptainWolfe11
Summary: Serenity's inner voices have never been entirely quiet, and her heart never fully understood. When fate places her in the hands of someone who just might be able to understand her, will she be able to face her inner demons? Murdock/OC Rated T for mentions of attempted suicide (on the part of the OC)
1. Chapter 1

_**Here's my first A-Team Fanfic! It just sorta popped into my head, and I needed to get it down onto 'paper' if you know what I mean. Anyway, I'd love to hear what you guys think of it. **_

_**I don't own The A-Team!**_

The darkness streaming through the nightshade windows was darker than dark, and the whispers were louder than loud. They thrummed in her ears and swallowed her whole, and it frightened her. It frightened Serenity. Serenity felt her entire soul seem to shrink and her hopes size down to a pinprick. The volume rose to a tremendous cacophony and she clapped her hands over her ears, gasping. She didn't want to listen, she didn't want to hear. Her heart pounded against her chest at a maddening pace, but it couldn't be let out. She needed it. The voices laughed. They spat at her, and coerced her to her feet, moving her like a puppet to the kitchen. No. Serenity thought. This can't be happening. I can't go in there! A feeling of dread clasped the poor woman as she fumbled through the dark. As soon as she entered the kitchen, it disappeared into a gulf of frantic searching. Items were flung off the counters and things fumbled with until a flash in the dark alerted her to her triumph. In her pale, trembling hand, a knife was clasped. A sob wormed its way up her throat. Why didn't they keep me there?! I can't do this by myself! Her mind screamed. She collapsed onto the cold floor, still clutching the knife. The last time she had done this, her father had found her, taken her to a new home. There was no one to find her now. There was only one person in this world who could make the voices go away just as good as the medicine, and Serenity hadn't seen him in quite a long time. A memory flashed to her mind, unbidden, and engulfed her senses like she was actually there...

* * *

_"Now Serenity, darling, you do know this is for the best, don't you?" Murmured a fat old man to the thin pale girl who was sitting stoically on the bed of her bland white room. The man was quite worried about the girl, his daughter, being left alone here, but he knew the facilities, and he trusted the faculty. Besides, he could visit more here._

_The girl looked to her father and nodded. "Yes, Papa. I want you to be happy." The man frowned, and the girl saw this wasn't the answer he had been looking for. She quickly amended the statement. "I mean to say, Papa, that I know I need to get better, and once I am better I think I should be happier."_

_He smiled slightly at that. "There's my girl." He pulled out a little pocket watch. "Well, I need to go, darling, but I will be back. Be a good girl and take the medicine." Serenity nodded solemnly._

_"I promise I will, Papa." The man nodded, and kissed the top of her head before walking out the door. Serenity was now left alone with her thoughts. They were strangely silent now, and although it was a relief, there was something lonely about it. It didn't help that her room was so very bare. Her father promised her things would come soon, but for now the walls were a stark white, and the bed bland, and the room furniture-less._

_Her father had found her at the house. It was empty, now that her mother had gone. She had kept the voices away. But with her gone...Serenity shuddered. She didn't like it when the voices controlled her. She had almost...robbed herself of her life, just to stop them...Fate had other ideas, though. Her father had found her in time. She had poured herself out to him, told him everything, and he had taken her here. She wasn't exactly why. She wasn't a war veteran. Although, her father was a famous general, and he did live close to the VA Hospital._

_She shrugged. I guess it didn't exactly matter. She was going to get better here, and that was what mattered._

* * *

_Days had gone by, and her stuff was delivered. She busied herself in adjusting her books on her old bookshelf, and arranging her records on her desk. The amazing lucidity in her mind was startling to her. She did still have her moments though...and the meds she was taking seemed to suck all of the life out of her. She hadn't left the room for days, but had been cordial to the nurses and taken any meds they had given her. The doctors had been slightly worried about this behavior, and asked her to go outside for a bit. She figured it wouldn't hurt to go outside, but had no desire to. In the end, she hadn't wanted the doctors to worry, so had agreed._

_She slipped out of her pajamas and into a comfortable little raggedy ensemble. She wore knitted leggings under a tattered brown skirt and a baggy cream sweater. She smiled sadly when she remembered her mother had knitted it._

_She padded outside barefoot, not bothering to slip on her old boots. The short grass tickled her feet and she wiggled her toes in it, though not finding any particular joy in it. She spied the large field, dotted with patients, MPs, doctors, and a few large, shade bearing trees. Deciding she didn't much like the licking of the sun on her head, she started for the shaded areas. Plopping down on the soft grass, she drew the notebook from her chest and flipped open to a blank page._

_Though she stared at it for a long time, she never felt any inspiration to draw. From afar, a man had been watching her curiously for quite some time as well, and decided he didn't like the glum look on her face._

_"Hiya!" Came the man's voice from above Serenity's head. She froze, startled, before looking up towards him and blinking the sun out of her eyes._

_"Um..." She didn't exactly know what to say to the tall, lanky man in khakis and a bomber jacket that towered above her form, so she smiled. "Hello."_

_The man dropped down onto the ground next to her and held out a hand. "I'm H.M. Murdock, little lady, and I couldn't help but notice how blue your vibes are."_

_Serenity smiled patiently but sadly. "Oh, um...yeah..." She looked down. "I suppose so..."_

_"It's the meds, ain't it? You're new here." Murdock frowned. He didn't like the side effects any more than the next person._

_She nodded. "I was thinking that as well. However, they stop the voices." Serenity winced. "I don't much like the voices."_

_The man, Murdock, seemed to sympathize with her. "I'm sorry, little lady. I know how you feel. But, you know, when I feel like that, I just look up into the big blue yonder and pretend I'm up there, like the birds."_

_This made Serenity smile slightly. "You're a pilot."_

_He grinned a wide, toothy grin. "Captain Howlin' Mad Murdock at your service, little miss. There ain't nothin' like lookin' into the wild blue sky from a bird's eye, if you know what I mean, sweetheart."_

_She shook her head. "I've never been up there, sir. I can only imagine what it must look like."_

_He chuckled. "Oh, imagination doesn't even cover it, pretty lady." He tipped his head towards her. "Speaking of which, I'd like to know your name, rather than come up with colorful adjectives. They just don't even do it justice." He winked._

_This caused the young woman to blush slightly. "Oh, um, my name's Serenity, Mr. Murdock."_

_"Oh, nonononononono, Renny, don't call me that. I'm just Murdock to all us fellow insane people. That's a beautiful name, by the way. Sereeeenity. Seeeeeerenity. Sereniiiiiity."_

_The woman giggled, genuinely. "My mother said it was unique."_

_Murdock winked again. "Well, then, I'd say it fit's you perfect. In a nice way, I'mean."_

_Serenity smiled. "Thank you, Mr-oh, um, Murdock."_

_Just then, a doctor came up. "Come on Murdock, you know what time it is." The pilot nodded in a melancholy way, before glancing back up at Serenity in a smile that was a stark contrast. After a small moment of deliberation, he grabbed her hand and placed a small kiss on it._

_"Adieu, dear Lady Serenity. I will return soon." He stated in a gallant French patter. He jumped up, but as soon as he started after that doctor, his shoulders slumped. He hated shock therapy._

**_TADA! Chapter One, My friends. I know it's short, but I figured that would help me organize my thoughts better:) Feedback would be better than a Chipmunk in a party hat!_**


	2. Chapter 2

**_Chapter two, peoples:) Just soes you knows, the italics are memories and thoughts and the like. Thanks for the people who reviewed!_**

**_A-Team I do not own...Serenity, yes._**

_Serenity flinched again at the wild screams of the patient whose room was adjacent to her. It seemed like every night he woke up, tortured by some terrible reoccurring dream. It took hours to console him completely, but tonight it seemed to never stop. After awhile, the woman couldn't handle it anymore. She stood up and popped her head out of the door. Nurse Bailey was just exiting his room, wearing a pale look. "Excuse me Miss Bailey."_

_The nurse barely gave her a glance. "I'm busy, miss."_

_"I know, but I was wondering if I could take a walk outside." Serenity put in quickly._

_"It's past curfew." Bailey reminded her._

_Serenity paled. "I know, but I don't know how much more of the yelling I can take." The nurse regarded her for a moment before nodding towards her._

_"All right, but don't stay out too long, it's cold tonight."_

_Without skipping a beat, Serenity bolted towards the yard, not even bothering to change out of her baggy pajama pants and tattered T-Shirt. When she finally made it to her favorite tree, she collapsed onto the ground. Her palms were clammy and her stomach churned violently. She had never heard a man scream like that before. She slowly breathed in the cold night air, feeling it centered her slightly._

_"What's wrong, little lady?" Serenity's sharp grey orbs snapped to her friend's brown ones._

_"Oh, Murdock, you startled me." She shook her head and rubbed her shivering arms. The Captain knew the difference from cold shivers and fear shivers, and even though the night was as cold and crisp as the rat-tat of machine gun fire, he knew it wasn't the temperature that was getting to Serenity._

_"Well, as much as Billy and I are sorry, that still ain't an answer, sweetheart." The mention of Billy hadn't even got a smirk out of Serenity, which made the pilot even more worried._

_"Oh, well, I just wanted some fresh air, you know?" She attempted a smile._

_Murdock plopped down onto the grassy patch next to her. "Now, honey, I saw you runnin' out here like you was bein' chased by a wild antelope monkey."_

_Serenity was still as white as a sheet, and though she knew she would be smiling at his words at another time, she was too shaken to even really register them currently. "Well, I guess I can't fool you, huh?" She smirked shakily._

_"No siree ma'am, I'm the only one who can fool me."_

_Serenity sighed. "Well, I couldn't sleep. You know the guy who bunks in the room next to me?"_

_Murdock winced. "Clayton Vince. Poor little feller."_

_She drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her too-skinny arms around them. Her slightly green face contorted into a nightmarish grimace, like she was looking into the face of the grim reaper. "I've never heard a man scream so awful in my life." He delicate frame shuddered so violently that for a moment the pilot thought the young lady was having a seizure. She was shaking like a leaf. "It's simply h-horrible..." She seemed to be really shaken by this. The sheer terror and pain in those screams still sounded so close by. Her eyes fluttered open and closed as she lifted her trembling chin to the black sky. "I send a prayer up for that man every night, but I feel like it isn't ever going to do any good."_

_That wasn't a statement Murdock had expected. For some reason, he hadn't pegged the quiet, dark, secluded girl to be religious. Then again, he figured her personality wasn't all under control at the moment. "Sometimes, Renny, you just need faith to carry on." He sounded too much like Captain Murdock when he said those words. Serenity glanced up at him with a little worry, and a little sadness._

_"Oh, I suppose it isn't anything particularly new to you..." She murmured delicately._

_He shook his head slowly, his thoughts pulling him back to a place he didn't want to be. "No ma'am, it ain't."_

_Serenity suddenly bristled. "Damn that war and the people who started it!" She looked just as surprised as Murdock was at her sudden outburst. "I-um, apologize for my language..." She bit her lip. "It just doesn't seem right, does it?"_

_"Life, uh, rarely is right, sweet cakes." Murmured Murdock._

_She seemed to think about this for a moment, before whispering softly. "Was it beautiful?"_

_Murdock gave her a look. "Pardon me?"_

_"Was it beautiful?" she asked again. "Besides the fighting, was it beautiful? Vietnam."_

_Now it was his turn to be silent. After a while, he looked at her with terribly dark eyes. "You know, I didn't really have the heart to notice."_

_Serenity gulped. "I apologize. That wasn't appropriate, was it? I'm sorry." She placed her chin on her knees and stared of into the distance. Why did I even ask? She thought._

_"I suppose it woulda been, Renny, if there weren't so much hate in that soil." The Captain's voice came to her in a soft, haunted drawl that made Serenity think he was looking into the past. She silently cursed herself._

_"I suppose the world would be beautiful too, if it wasn't for us."_

_Murdock glanced at the shaken young woman curled up next to him. He frowned, not much liking the cynical side of her. He had learned gradually that her cynical nature was usually a bi-product of the voices she fought back._

_"Serenity, the whole world would be beautiful if people stopped lookin' at the dark and focused on the good parts." He slung an arm around her shoulder. "Now I know that look, sweetheart, but I'm tellin' you to have a little hope." She glanced at the oddly lucid pilot curiously._

_"Hope, in this place?" She shuddered. As much as the meds helped her, the white washed walls never lost their menace._

_Murdock leaned in closer, and Serenity saw the seriousness, and a little bit of desperation in his eyes. "Someone has to hope, Renny. Someone has to keep sendin' those prayers to the big guy upstairs, because most of us just don't have it in us to try anymore." From the look on his face, Serenity knew he counted himself among that number._

_She smiled and nodded. "Roger that Captain." She tried to push all of the swarming dark away. "Where were you anyway? I hear from the nurses that you disappear every once an awhile, but where to?"_

_The man grinned his lopsided grin, making Serenity's heart skip a beat. "Well, I ain't gonna talk till you're on your way inside, you look positively chilled." He helped her up and they started walking back to her room. As Murdock started his tirade about Billy and flying Elephants, Serenity knew it wasn't true, but smiled anyway. The Captain knew she didn't buy it, but the truth wouldn't do, and he was grateful she played along._

_All the while, Serenity listened, and put in things where she ought to, and laughed when she needed to, and put a serious mask on her face when his words called for it. The smile on her face was genuine, though. Even Murdock, so skilled in doing so, couldn't hide the hurt in his eyes, and Serenity promised herself solemnly that she would add a little prayer for him too._

_What she didn't realize, was the way Murdock scanned her face and saw her strife, and promised himself he would send a prayer of his own upstairs for his friend, even though he hadn't done anything like that since Vietnam._

* * *

_The shell of Serenity sobbed in the corner of her room, completely broken and terribly alone. Murdock had gone off, and on top of that, this...She hugged herself tighter and shivered, even though she was currently smothered in blankets._

_In all her time here, she had never refused medication. Today was a different story. She had screamed at the nurse and smacked the medication out of her hand. They might have put her to sleep had she not then shrunk back in the corner, apologizing abundantly and sobbing terribly. She only lashed out if they got near, and she got more distressed each time they tried._

_A nurse, named Leslie, was fond of Serenity. She knew why this was happening, and knew they wouldn't really be able to help her. She hated what they were planning. If only they could get across to the woman before they had to do this..._

_Just then, Leslie spotted Murdock, no doubt coming back from another escapade. She ran over to him. "Mr. Murdock, Mr. Murdock! Please I need your help!" The worried nurse cried. She had seen the calming effect the two had on each other, and thought this just might work._

_The confused Captain stopped in his tracks. "My help? Lady, you must be the crazy one." Leslie was not deterred._

_"It's Miss Wilds, sir. She wont let us near her and I'm afraid of what we might have to do if we can't calm her down. I thought maybe you could talk to her-"_

_The pilot was now all business. "Move aside, I'm on my way." He marched quickly to her room, long legged strides causing the nurse to run after him._

_When they reached the door, Leslie stopped. "I'll be right here." He nodded, then carefully walked in._

_Serenity was curled up in a corner, wrapped in a protective layer of wool, and sobbing hysterically. It was enough to jerk the man's heartstrings rather violently. "Renny? Renny, It's me, Mudock, remember?" She didn't respond. He slowly walked towards her, but she showed no signs she knew he was there. He crouched down right in front of her. "Renny-?" He reached out a hand and laid it on her shoulder gently._

_Instantly, she clamped a hand on his wrist and screamed bloody murder, shoving it away, and swatting at him with her skinny arms. "NO! I won't take your medicine. GET AWAY!" The Vet was surprised for a moment, before regaining himself. He couldn't grab her flailing wrists, lest she thought he was trying to force give her medicine, which would make her panic even more. In the end, he winced as her arms hit him and pulled her into a strong embrace._

_"Renny, it's me, sunshine. No one's gonna give you anymore meds right now, see? I wont let em." From the folds of his shirt a quiet voice squeaked._

_"Murdock?" The weakness in her voice was terrible to witness._

_"That's right, sweetheart." For a few minutes, she sobbed into his chest, both relieved and hurting. Finally she pulled away, her eyes red rimmed and her skin even paler than usual._

_"M Sorry, Murdock." She apologized with slurred words._

_He rubbed her arms softly, trying to quell her shivering. "I just don't understand, sweetcakes, you've never been upset about takin' meds before."_

_An almighty shudder jerked her. After a moment of painful silence, she finally choked the words out. "They did something to me, Murdock. I'll never...I'll never...be me again..."_

_The Captain froze. He had heard plenty about the terrible side effects of the drugs. Had they done something to her? "What happened?"_

_She trembled for a moment before weakly scooting forward into his arms. Her body was loose and weak, like what was bothering her had stolen all of her energy, all of her will to live. She laid there for a long time, listening to her friend's breathing and heartbeat. The voices on the edge of her mind retreated somewhat from the protection Murdock offered. "I wasn't feeling right." She murmured at last. "They did an exam, they told me...they told me..." Her chest tightened up and her heartbeat raced. "I heard about the side effects, but I thought they would be better than the voices." In a tiny whispering voice, she whimpered out the next line. "I was wrong." Murdock tensed. He had never seen her so low. He knew he needed to wait for her to speak. Finally Serenity pulled away from him and looked into his deep chocolate eyes. She was embarrassed, ashamed, and guilty. She didn't want to say it, but knew she had to. She knew she needed to face him while she said it. It would help her face it herself. "They told me I can't ever have kids, HM. They said the meds...they made it so...so..." She couldn't finish. The tears overwhelmed her eyes and spilled outwards. She looked up to the sky, lip trembling and voice cracking. "God, HM, I always wanted to have kids so bad." That revelation shook Murdock to the core as he watched his sweet Serenity tremble. She always was so gentle and calm. She would have been the perfect mother, he mused. He cupped her face with his hands, making her look at him. Her eyes seemed like lifeless gray orbs, unseeing, almost._

_"Oh, darlin'. I'm sorry. I can't even imagine what you must me feeling. I just..." For once in a long while, HM Murdock had no idea what to say. He had felt lost before, and look what it did to him. He figured he needed to help her but he didn't know how. He stroked her soft cheek with his thumb, although she didn't seem to feel it. He sighed. An idea had hit him, but he wasn't fond of it. At all. The sight of Serenity trembling like that however, forced him forwards. He yanked off his coat and started undoing the buttons on his shirt._

_"What are you doing?" Serenity mumbled. She wasn't really startled. He had his Napolean shirt on underneath his buttonup, but she was nevertheless confused. She'd never seen him with less than his longsleeve button up on. When he had loosened all of the buttons, he threw it off and shyly moved his arm towards her. For a moment she was downright lost, but then she spotted the ghostly white lines wrapping around his wrists, and the small pockmarks and thin webbing along his skin. She gasped lightly. She knew the soft marks had once been an angry red, and she could only imagine the pain...Why had he shown her, of all people, those marks? "HM..." She choked out. Tentatively, she reached out a hand and traced the lines on his arm, wincing at the small moan he choked out. Angry tears leaked out of her eyes. "How could anyone do something like this? To my HM of all people..." She nearly gaged, imagining someone doing these things to her jolly friend. Murdock frowned. He hadn't meant to upset her more, he just wanted her to know she wasn't alone..._

_"You and I and a whole bunch of other people know what it means to be unmade, Renny. I know that you can't talk about it to someone who's never felt that way, at least, not without regret, and...if you need to talk about it...or somethin'...or..." He was stopped by the soft kiss she laid on his cheek._

_"Then I know just who to talk to." She reached for his button up and handed it to him, hands no longer trembling. "Thank you." Her eyes meant more than her words; they said everything she didn't know how to._

_He studied her for a moment and saw...he didn't know what it was, actually, but it wasn't pity, and he was grateful for that. He shrugged his shirt on and snatched up his jacket. Serenity put a hand on his arm. "I don't know if I want to talk more about it just yet, but...I will later." She smiled. "Now go get some sleep, HM, you look like a you need it. You can tell me about your adventure later." He smiled his lopsided smile and nodded._

_"Yes ma'am." He stood up and started out on shaky legs._

_"Murdock?" She called out._

_"Yep." He turned around to look at her._

_She paused for a moment before gathering her resolve. "Tell em I'll take the meds now."_

_Murdock smiled softly at Serenity. She was so strong and she never gave up. She made him feel sane, and she did it without trying. She was stronger then most men he had seen on the battlefield. In a huskier voice than he had intended to use, he replied, with his hand snapped up in a salute. "Yes, Ma'am."_

**_Well, that scene was hard to finish...I'm just gonna be framing the main things that happen at the VA, but I might go into further detail later. If anyone has suggestions or anything, I would be happy to hear them. I'm just a little baby writer who would love any tips:) Well then, till I see you again, ta! _**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Hello again! Sorry for the wait. I've been getting ready for the thing called...SCHOOL. Hopefully I'll be able to quickly update this story to the end, but you never know how hard school will slap me in the face. This, folks, is my last day of freedom, and I intend to use it writing!_**

**_Disclaimer: SERENITY IS MINE! The A-Team, not so much._**

_The rain pattered on the windows of the music room, and the drops sent the bent light scattering across the walls. The soft, scratchy drawl of an old record sang down the empty halls. Most people were out on holiday. She would be out too. For good. A stray tear slipped out of her eye. Footsteps littered the once quiet halls, though Serenity didn't hear them. "It ought to be a crime, pretty lady like you cryin' on Christmas eve." Serenity jumped, but then relaxed._

_"Oh, hey, HM. I thought you were out with Billy." She suspected her voice was a little harder than it needed to be._

_He ambled closer. Something was bothering his little lady. She always seemed to have something on her mind. "Well, I was, but then I figured there was one pretty lady who shouldn't be left all alone here on Christmas."_

_Despite herself, Serenity smiled. "Thanks, HM." She sighed. "But you shouldn't have come back."_

_That line dug itself into the pilot's chest like a round of led. "W-Why not, Renny." She winced at the hurt in his voice._

_She turned her eyes on him. A knowing but sad smile inched across her face. "It would have made it easier to leave." The pilot stared, stunned. She was leaving?_

_"I'm sane, Murdock. At least, on paper...as long as I take my meds." She sighed, looking out of the window. "My Papa is coming to pick me up soon."_

_Murdock's happiness had all drained away. "Oh." Was all he could get out. Serenity stood up and turned to face him, but stopped in her tracks as soon as she laid eyes on him. His tall form was drooping like he was a cartoon character, with his bony shoulders hunched and head hung. The hand that had been behind his back was now hanging down, a bundle of maroon tipped carnations clutched in it's grip. She bit her lip. She remembered telling him those were her favorite flowers...but that had been so long ago. Her hand covered her trembling lips._

_"Oh, HM..." She breathed. "They're beautiful."_

_He looked up at her, still mostly hunched. "Really? You mean you still want em?" She swallowed a sob and smiled._

_"Of course I do, HM." She hurried over to him and grabbed his hanging hand bringing up the carnations. She breathed in their soft scent, a real smile on her face now. She looked up at the pilot, who looked equal parts crestfallen and confused. She took the flowers from him and brushed a lock of stringy black hair from her face. "I don't wanna leave, you know." Murdock just blinked. Didn't want to leave? This place was awful! He thought she would be glad to be rid of it, to be rid of him._

_"Why not?" Serenity smiled shakily and placed the flowers on a nearby table. The song that was playing now was Summertime. She loved that song._

_"Because you're here, Murdock." The light in his chocolate brown eyes was immediately rekindled, and he smiled a lopsided grin._

_"You mean that?" He couldn't believe his ears! She was sayin' that to him? A run down, crazy ol' pilot from Nam?_

_She grinned. "More than most things I say, HM." He loved her spunky side. He didn't get to see it often, as it only emerged when she was completely in control of the voices. "You just gonna stand there, or are you gonna ask me to dance?" Instantly, he grabbed her hands and twirled her around and into the deepest dip she thought had ever been done; her hair was touching the ground! He whipped her back up and winked at her._

_"Never thought you'd mention it, sweetheart." She giggled and slid closer to him, looking up into his brown orbs. She stood up on her tippie toes and gave him a real kiss, not just one on the cheek. He seemed stunned for a moment, before adopting a wistful smile. Serenity just leaned closer, and they swayed to the music as the day drew to a close._

_"Renny?"_

_"Hmmm?"_

_"I really like you."_

_A pause, and a soft laugh. "I love you too, HM."_

_Nurse Leslie blinked back tears as she listened to the exchange, sad that she had to break it apart. Mr. Wilds had come at a bad time..._

* * *

The dark enveloped Serenity once more. The knife in her hand trembled dangerously. What would HM say? She couldn't do this...for his sake. After her Daddy had picked her up, they had moved. He was nervous, and she had thought he was running from someone. He never let her out, not even to visit Murdock. Then, she had gotten angry, slipped away, but when she had heard the news, she couldn't believe her ears. Her Papa, dead. Killed in a drive by. She thought she knew who it was. She went to Papa's office and looked at the papers, and hid when the men came in and burned the files. A man called Wilson Blake. But there was nothing she could do against that man...

In her flight, she had forgotten to take her pills. So now, she was huddled in her newly acquired trashy apartment, about to kill herself, and fighting the voices that had come back with a vengeance.

She snapped up a quick prayer, but just when she thought she couldn't stand it anymore, a bright little idea hit her smack in the face. What was that group her father had talked about? They helped people who needed them...they were in the military, she thought. They could take down Blake. What were they called again. Ah, yes...the A-Team.

* * *

Serenity sighed as she checked her watch again, forcing back the encroaching voices. They were supposed to be here an hour ago. She was supposed to go to the corner of Garber street and wait till she met with someone.

An elderly man, well dressed, stepped forward, and for a moment, she was relieved, but that feeling went away as soon as it came.

"Ma'am would you care to hear about Jesus Christ?" He was holding many pamphlets in his hand, and one out to her. She smiled. She was always impressed with people who were faithful enough to go out and face ridicule from others.

"No, thank you sir."

He looked startled. "But you must, surely. The end times are upon us!"

Serenity gave a rather terse smile, the voices had just risen a few notches. "Believe you me, if anyone knows that, it would be me, sir." She sighed. "But I'll take one, anyway if it makes you feel any better." She took the proffered pamphlet, and the man smiled, but didn't go away.

"Aren't you going to read it?" Serenity almost growled. The voices were now a fever pitch and she had no patience. She didn't however. Instead, she stiffly opened the pamphlet, gasping when she read the words. You have found the A-Team. When she looked back up at the man, he looked different, his mustache was gone and a cigar was now in his mouth. He just smirked at her.

"Well, kid, if you want our help, follow me." She did, and he led her to an alleyway with a black van parked right in the middle. She gulped. Well, if they killed her, at least she'd be put out of her misery. The older man opened the sliding door and gestured for her to get in. She did and he followed her in, closing the door. "I'm Hannibal Smith. That's B.A." Serenity shook the older man's hand and then looked to her right. She blinked. A black man with a mohawk and about a ton of gold was staring at her from the front. She swallowed hard.

"Um, hi?" She winced at how timid her voice was.

"We ain't gonna hurt you, mama." Said B.A. She nodded a thanks, but then drew a sharp breath and covered her ears instinctively. The voices had just screamed out of nowhere, but she shoveled them down.

"Are you alright, Miss Wilds?" Serenity glanced up at Hannibal, who was looking at her with concern. He didn't need his client to go dropping like a fly.

She smiled shakily. "I'm fine. You wouldn't happen to have any Chlorpromazine laying around would you?"

Hannibal froze. "Why would you need an Anti-psychotic, Miss Wilds?" She gave a frustrated sigh.

"So I can set it up on a pedestal and worship it's side effects." She bit her lip and let out a pained gasp as the voices rose higher again. "What do you think, Colonel? I can't much focus with all these voices firing off in my head!"

"Hannibal, we can't have two crazy fools with us!" Grunted B.A. Serenity glared.

"Relax, B.A." He turned his attention to Serenity. "I'm sorry, Miss, but we wont be able to get you some. Maybe, if you'd mentioned your condition sooner."

Serenity winced. "I didn't think so anyway, Colonel." She furrowed her brow. "I thought there were more of you?"

Hannibal smirked around his cigar and swiveled the chair around so it faced the front. "There are, Miss Wilds. One of our men had to go get the other. They should be here soon." A banging on the door made the Colonel chuckle. "What'd I tell ya? Come in boys." The door slid open, and Serenity blinked at the sudden light. "Miss Wilds, the short handsome one is Face, and the other is-"

"HM!" Serenity screeched, jumping out of the van and nearly choking him in a bear hug. "My goodness, I missed you! What are you doing here?"

"Renny?" Gasped the pilot in surprise. "What are YOU doing here?"

"She's the client, Murdock." Stated a curious Hannibal.

"Are we, uh, missing something here?" Asked Face.

Serenity ignored them. "I'm so sorry I didn't visit. Papa wouldn't let me." Her eyes were fixed on his, as if the only thing she needed right now was his forgiveness.

Murdock frowned slightly. Maybe she hadn't been able to come, but...he winced as he remembered the nights where he cried out for her, and the times when he would hug the little stuffed dog she had given him, crying himself to sleep over her absence. He didn't think he could just forgive her all whippy snappy. Suddenly she cried out and fell to her knees.

"SHUT UP!" She cried in desperation, now a ball on the pavement. Face and Hannibal exchanged worried glances. Murdock, though, knew what to do. He instantly fell down next to her, grabbing her chin in his hand.

"Look at me. Renny, Look at me." She made a whimpering sound, but did as he said. She looked into his big brown eyes like a lost child. He had long since figured out that the voices were stronger when she was upset. He sighed. "I forgive you, sweetheart." She blinked for a moment and let a tear slide down her face. Forcing a limp smile to her face, she tried to say thank you, but Murdock shushed her. "I know." He helped her up and placed her in a seat. Her pale face burned pink with embarrassment, and she avoided the other gazes.

"Care to explain, Murdock?" Asked Hannibal gently. The Captain gave him a look that clearly said 'later'. The Colonel nodded, and turned to B.A. "Take us back to Face's place." The driver nodded, and soon they had started down the road. The car was full of a fitful silence that Murdock guessed Serenity wasn't hearing. She was staring into a whole different world. It stayed like that until they got to Face's scammed apartment. Murdock stayed close to Serenity, one arm around her protectively. As soon they got to the place, Murdock turned to Hannibal.

"Colonel?" The older man sighed, and then nodded his head.

"Go ahead, Captain." Murdock guided Serenity to Face's room and shut the door behind them. In the living room, the three other men exchanged glances.

Finally, B.A. spoke up. "I knew any girl he ended up with would be a crazy fool like him." The mechanic's voice was soft.

_**The end! Not of everything, just this chappie:) Probably only two or three chapters left. Tell me whatcha think!**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Sorry for the longer delay than normal! I just got this section all edited. Anyway, enjoy, my darling readers!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Zee A-Team!**_

Serenity curled up next to Murdock, feeling really cold for some reason. "Renny, why didn't you take your meds. They help you a lot, don't they?"

She sighed. "Yeah but...I forgot em when I ran away..."

Murdock blinked. "You ran away? Why?"

She winced. "Daddy wouldn't let me go out. He was afraid of someone..." She glanced up at him before looking away. "I wanted to see you...but then I heard on the news he'd been killed and I..." She sighed deeply. "I went to investigate. I found files on a man he was having trouble with. I think he was stealing money from some people...His name's Wilson Blake. I-I'm just glad I found you guys..." She smiled a shaky smile. She was about to lay a hand on his cheek, but he grabbed her arm suddenly. She froze.

"Serenity." His voice was a deathly growl. She yanked her arm away and got up, stalking to the window. "Who did that to you?" She trembled, holding her bandaged wrist protectively. "I swear I'll..."

"What? Do what, Murdock?" She snapped at him, fear and embarrassment flashing in her eyes.

All at once, the realization hit the pilot hard. "No..."

"Yes! Yes, okay. I...hurt myself." Her own words sounded like a poison to her. They stung her lips as she spit them out. She couldn't stand the expression on Murdock's face. "Just don't look at me like that." She pleaded. Even the voices in her head were silent now. He was even quieter. Anger and betrayal washed over her. He had been with her when the going got tough. Was he going to judge her now?

Murdock just stared at Serenity. How could she do that to herself? She was so strong and beautiful...it felt like she had done it to him. He remembered that she hadn't been taking the medicine, but she never mentioned that she hurt herself like that..."Why?" He finally choked out dryly.

She pressed her hands against the windowsill until her knuckles turned white. Her heart pounded fitfully. Should she even tell him? No, she needed to tell him. She would go even further into the deep end if she didn't tell someone. "The only reason I have them is because I didn't have the guts to press harder." Her gut twisted at the pain in her voice. She hardly sounded like herself. That was not how she'd wanted to say it. Yes, she hadn't done it the night she got the idea to look for the A-Team...but there were nights when she didn't think she was going to find them...and she had only just stopped herself. She felt abundantly weak, alone, and worthless. She turned around to face the man. "Believe me, I tried to end it. I almost did. I-"

"No! Nonononononono!" Murdock had suddenly covered his ears and shut his eyes in pain. Serenity stared in shock. So that was it then? She had gone too far for even Murdock to accept her. He didn't even want to listen to her! She was hurting him, so she stopped. She turned her back to him and flinched when she heard Murdock run out and slam the door. This was it, huh? The man who had stopped her from doing herself in couldn't even bring himself to look at her now. He didn't even want to hear her say it. Why hadn't he heard her out? Why had he just left? _Because you're worthless. You're not worth the pain._ The voices mocked her, and laughed. Her whole body trembled.

* * *

Hannibal twisted around as Murdock fled from the bedroom, hands pressed over his ears. "Captain." The pilot didn't even respond. He flopped onto the couch, rocking back and forth. "What's wrong, Captain?" He just shook his head, trembling from head to toe. What had disturbed him so? BA was keeping watch outside and Face was in the kitchen. "Murdock, I need an answer." He shook the pilot lightly. Murdock's panic filled brown eyes flashed open.

"Serenity!" He cried out. Hannibal frowned. What had that girl said? He was going to give her a piece of his mind.

"Face!" The conman emerged from the kitchen. "Watch Murdock, will you?" Hannibal pulled out his gun cautiously and headed for Face's room...

* * *

Colonel Hannibal Smith had seen a lot of things, but that didn't stop him from cursing as he rounded the bed and saw Wilds on the ground in a growing puddle of blood. "PECK!" He shouted. "GET A DOCTOR HERE NOW!" He needed to stop the blood. He heard fumbling in the other room. He yanked the comforter off of the bed and wrapped it around her wrist, and it was quickly getting soaked.

"They're on their way, Hannibal. Why do we-" Face's sentence broke off as soon as he saw the client. More like a patient now. He cursed. "I'll get the medkit." He returned shortly with a first aid kit, which Hannibal deftly used to clean the wound and wrap it up.

"Let's just hope they get here in time." Amid all of the chaos, HM Murdock sat on the couch, rocking back and forth, humming the tune to Summertime.

* * *

As soon as consciousness found her, so did terror. A sharp peal burst past her lips and she struggled upwards. A hand fell against her arm and she tried to shake it away, falling over in the process. The other person came down with her. "Now just calm down, I'm not going to hurt you." Said a female voice. Serenity just closed her eyes and stopped struggling. Something was strange.

"What's wrong, Maggie?" Came a familiar voice. Who was that? She couldn't place it. Suddenly, she jerked. There were no voices...it was blissfully quiet.

Serenity burst upwards. She saw an older looking brunette woman and a man...Hannibal! How did she know his name? She tried to remember, but it was all a blur. "What happened? Where am I?"

Hannibal stared at her with stony eyes. Murdock still wasn't coherent, and he didn't know the full story, only that she did it to him. Truth be told, he didn't have a whole lot of respect for people who took the easy way out, but he tried to tell himself that he had no idea what was going on in the woman's head. He had seen some of Murdock's low points and he didn't know what the pilot would of done had they not been there. "What's the last thing you remember, Kid?" Serenity paused. It was hazy...she was in a room with Murdock...she was angry...she talked to him about...about her wrists...She glanced down to see her heavily bandaged wrists. Maggie and Hannibal exchanged glances. She suddenly remembered the anguish, though now less pronounced. And the blood. She tried to talk for a moment, but then promptly threw up.

* * *

Maggie had cleaned her up, and she was now sitting on a couch with a blanket around her. Now that she was free of the voices, she felt hollow. She couldn't even understand the woman who had actually tried to kill herself. In fact, the only reason she suspected she was sane right now was because she had convinced herself that that woman _was_ a different person. "Where'd you get the Chlorpromazine?" She asked the doctor.

Maggie didn't even look at her. "Loxapine. We got it from the VA."

Serenity blinked. That was Murdock's medication. Why did they use that? And why was everyone so mad at her? "What's wrong?"

Maggie sighed. "It's Murdock."

Serenity's gut clenched. "What happened to him?"

"He's catatonic. No one can get anything out of him after what you did." Serenity blinked.

"Can I see him?"

Maggie snorted. "Good luck getting the Colonel to agree to that. As far as he's concerned, it's your fault."

Serenity took a moment to savor the feeling of regret that seeped through her, before standing up and heading for the door. "I best be going, then."

"Wait!" Cried the doctor as she stood in front of her.

"Wait for what?" Serenity sighed. "I've done it, haven't I? There's no way they're going to help me now."

"You don't know that..." Stated the doc, hands on her hips.

Serenity just shook her head, not wanting to do any more damage. "I really think I ought to go. I don't know how many more people I'll accidentally throw into a coma."

Seeing the determination in Serenity's eyes, she held out a bottle."You'll need this." She handed a bottle of Loxapine to Serenity. "I would talk to Hannibal. He's all show, but he does what he knows is right in the end." The girl nodded before stepping outside, heading straight for a taxi. She really didn't want to talk to Hannibal right now; She didn't want to talk to anybody. She most certainly didn't want to face Murdock.

Hannibal watched her go from the van. She had hurt one of his men, and he didn't know if Murdock was going to snap out of it this time. In all honesty, he didn't know whether or not seeing Serenity would have a good or bad effect on his pilot, so right now, he was caring for him the only way he knew how-with the team. If they needed to find her later on, they could. The Colonel looked down at his unhinged Captain. He really hoped this wasn't the last straw for Murdock. He had talked about some girl he met like she was an angel, and assuming he had been talking about Serenity, hearing about her hurting herself might just have popped the last screw loose. The pilot was currently curled up in a ball, asleep, but murmuring one word. "Serenity."

* * *

"Where to." Said the gruff cabby.

"Anywhere but here." Murmured Serenity.

The cabby let out a feral laugh. "You got it." He turned around. "Nice to finally meet you, Miss. The name's Wilson Blake." The gas pedal hit the floor board and they sped off, but not before Serenity let out a terrified scream.

* * *

The swift rat-tat of machine gun fire cut through the empty hallways and woke Serenity right up. She cursed, and started on her rope bonds once more. That was the third time she had fallen asleep that night. In any case, those machine guns did not sound nice, and she wanted to be gone by the time they got there. The ropes were getting looser, and slicker, due to a certain crimson liquid, and after a few minutes they were jimmied off, taking more than Serenity would have liked with them. She stumbled upwards with the rope in hand, and crept to the door. There was a man guarding it. Quietly, she snuck behind him and threw the rope about his neck, choking him long enough to grab his gun. She then pointed it at him, and tied him up in the room she had been in. She sneaked down the halls, trying to move away from the guns.

She had no idea how those men had found her but she assumed they had their secret evil people ways that she didn't know about. She had no idea how they could have known she needed a taxi, either. They might have been following her. Wilson Blake probably wanted to kill her, but she was just happy that he had waited a few hours. Maybe he wanted to have a little fun with her first. Serenity winced. Over her dead body...She chuckled darkly. What a fine sense of humor she had on her today. And what was this with the machine guns? She supposed all she should be worried about was getting away from them. She'd had enough of seeing her own blood for a while, thank you.

Suddenly, a man rounded a corner, and seeing her, aimed his gun at her. Serenity screamed and ducked as a bullet flew beside her. "You're causing more trouble than you're worth, bitch." She looked up at the man, Wilson, she realized, and glared.

"Looks like you'll get to die after all, you pathetic, suicidal, whore." He chuckled and lifted his gun, while Serenity let out a small prayer. Like it would even be answered. She didn't deserve it. There was a shot, and she flinched. Soon after, she realized she was still alive.

"That's what you get when you mess with the A-Team, slimeball." Hannibal's voice came from above her head. Serenity pushed herself up, and visibly flinched when she saw the machine gun in his hand. She looked to Wilson, to see him on the ground.

"Oh, heavens. Did you kill him?" She choked out, sounding like she was going to puke again.

"Kill him? He doesn't deserve it. Just shot him in the leg. He won't be able to get very far before the police get here. Come on." He gestured for her to follow, and she did, running through the bare halls.

"Why?" She asked simply.

Hannibal felt a little bad, seeing as she had asked why instead of how. "Because, kid, whether you like it or not, you got yourself involved with us. That made this personal."

Serenity stopped. "But...Murdock." Hannibal stopped too, looking back at her.

He studied her for a moment, and then sighed. "He got a little better when we told him we were gonna go after you."

"But...how did you know he had me?" Serenity questioned.

Hannibal grinned. "Kid, I have never heard anyone scream louder in my life."

_**AAAAAAND, There it is. If you are confused about Murdock's reaction, you won't be disappointed in the next chappie! I don't know if this was all believable, and I stumbled over the middle quite a lot, but I hope you guys like it. I'll try to be swift in my updates!**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Well, here you are, Chapter Five on a silver platter! I hope you enjoy it. Disclaimer: I don't own The A-Team.**_

Serenity sat in the back with Face, wishing she had a window to look out instead of a metal door. The van was dead silent, and she didn't dare study the expressions of the other occupants.

"Woah. Um, Miss Wilds, do you need something for your hands?" Serenity jumped at Face's voice.

Her hands were clasped over her raw wrists. "Oh, maybe. Looks like my stitches are fine. My skin's just rubbed raw." There was no doubt she'd have a reminder of this day for many years to come.

"It looks a little worse than just rubbed raw." Face put in. Serenity sighed.

"We'll put you back together when we get back to the apartment." Offered Hannibal. Serenity nodded, though she noted later that the Colonel couldn't see her.

Sure enough, when they got back, Maggie cleaned out her wrists with rubbing alcohol, which left Serenity drawing blood from her lip. New bandages were applied, and Maggie pushed her to the door of Face's room, a knowing look in her eyes. Serenity glanced up at Hannibal, who motioned her ahead, cigar in hand. She took a deep breath, then pushed the door open, slipped inside, and shut it behind her.

The room was darkened, as the thick curtains were drawn. Serenity fastidiously ignored the side of the room where it had happened, letting a cold shiver run down her back. In front of her, a bed loomed out of the dark, and on it, a lump of covers. When focused upon, the soft rise and fall of breathing could be ascertained. Deciding it was now or never, Serenity slowly started forward. "HM?" She called softly. No response. She inched closer, slowly crawling onto the bed. "It's Serenity." A low moan drifted to her from the Murdock-lump.

"...Renny?" A hoarse voice called out.

"Yes!" Serenity smiled, happy he finally talked. "Yes, it's me, HM. I'm here." When she received no further response, she reached out a hand and placed it warily on his shoulder.

Instantly, Murdock flipped over, grabbing her wrist tightly. His eyes flashed with panic.

Serenity tensed, but tried not to show it, barely wincing at her stinging wrist. "HM. I'm here. You don't have to worry, no one's going to hurt you. Hannibal and the others are right outside." He seemed to calm down a bit, laying back down. His eyes never wavered from Serenity's face.

Inside, Serenity was a broil of worry and unease. How did what she said do this to him? And what should she say now? She nervously crawled a little closer. "I bet Billy's a little lonely, huh?" Nothing. Serenity frowned. She knew she was avoiding the problem, but she didn't know if she could really talk about it right now. "I-I didn't know why I said what I said earlier, HM. It just came out and I felt so lost and...I'm really sorry I hurt you. It just felt...it felt like...I don't know that I can really describe it..." Murdock was still staring at her, hand on her wrist. Inwardly, Serenity panicked. Could he even hear her? Where was her Murdock? She came even closer, laying down beside him and staring at the ceiling, wrist and hand together at their sides. "Are you even in there?" She whispered softly. She expected silence.

"Somewhere." He looked over to her, something like fear and hope mixing in his eyes. "Are you really here?"

Serenity was momentarily shocked at that question, but slowly got a feeling she knew where he was getting at. "I'm not...I'm not dead...Maggie patched me up..." She gulped. "I almost...died. But no."

Murdock looked back at the ceiling, releasing her wrist. "I'm sorry."

Serenity was rubbing her wrist gently. "Oh, you didn't hurt it that bad."

He frowned. "Not that."

She was confused, to say the least. "Then...what? What are you sorry for, HM?"

"You wanted to, didn't you."

The woman let out a soft sigh. Was she thick, or was he not making it clear? "Wanted to what?" She questioned again.

"Die!" He suddenly shouted, hands smacking down on the plush covers. "You wanted to die! You wanted to leave me. I wasn't enough, huh? Why stay in this lousy world when the only thing that gives a shit about you is some crazy ol' pilot!" He pounded his fist on the bed and rolled back over. "I wasn't enough for her either..."

Serenity paused, heart in throat. If there was one side of Murock she had never seen, it was the angry side. It was there, but it was hard to get to. And, what was that about not being enough for 'her either'? "Murdock, I..."

He turned over to face her, hands tearing at his hair and eyes full of pain. "What, you what? You're sorry? You're always sorry. You don't know what it was like without you there. I cried myself to sleep wantin' you there. You never came. _I loved you_...and you never came..."

She wanted to hold him, she wanted to say _sorry_. She wanted to tell him he was worth way more, but she didn't know if she had the words. "HM...I..." She paused, and prayed for the words. "I can't even pretend to know how much you've been hurt. All I know, is that I am constantly in awe of how you can be so strong. I haven't seen a fraction of what you have, and I...I could hardly bear it." She pushed herself off the bed and stared out the window, vision blurred by old memories. Suddenly, she whipped back to him, eyes begging him to understand.

"I'm a coward. Plain and simple. There was no other way I could get away from myself and I didn't think for a minute how my death would effect anyone. I mean, I didn't think anyone would care. I spent nights in bars and dingy motels alone, and the only thing in this universe that kept me from doing myself in before was the thought of you." She pressed her fists to her forehead, as if trying to pound a memory out of her head. "And when I told you that...you ran out the door. You're the only _damn_ thing in this world that keeps the voices away as good as the medicine. I-I didn't have anyone anymore. So I did it, halfway hoping I'd never wake up and halfway hoping someone would find me before it was too late. Thank God Hannibal _did_ find me..."

She fell to her knees. Murdock's anger had abated, and now he couldn't believe what had come out of his mouth. Maybe that had been how he felt, but it wasn't what happened. She hadn't purposefully left him. And honestly...there had been times...he shuddered. He wanted to apologize now, but he couldn't move. "I'm sorry that I didn't go and see you. I'm sorry I didn't run away sooner. I'm sorry you felt so alone, and I'm so so sorry that you fell in love with me, because there isn't a sorrier excuse for a woman on God's green earth." Slowly, on shaky legs, Serenity pulled herself up, not daring to glance at Murdock. "So, if I were you, I'd just forget you've ever met me, HM." With that, she turned to the door. She didn't know how she was going to face the others, but she needed to get out of here.

Her hand covered the doorknob just as Murdock's wrapped around her skinny arm. "Renny?" She let out a breath, more like a gasp, and let him turn her around to face him. He nudged her chin up with a finger, but she didn't meet his eyes. He just ducked his head down till they're eyes did meet. He seemed to struggle with what he was going to say. "I don't know much about women, that's more of Faceman's department, but...well..." He sighed. "All I know's that I've met a lot of them, tall ones, short ones, skinny ones, and fat ones, and I've never met one like you." He sucked in a breath. "I'm sorry 'bout what I said. My...temper...got away and I...You were there for me the days I came back from shock therapy, and when they switched my meds, and when I came back from a job, and you never asked questions. You just listened and held my hand and said all those cute, funny things that come outta your mouth and made me feel better without even tryin'. I...missed you. I'm sorry that I didn't understand how your father kept you at home. I'm sorry that I ran out when you needed me, and I'm sorry I fell in love with you, because I know I'm the sorriest excuse for a man the world's ever seen, and the most beautiful, amazin', understandin', courageous, beautiful woman in the world shouldn't be trapped with a crazy pilot like me."

Serenity blinked away tears, not in all the world understanding how anyone could say that about her. She was lost for words for a moment, and Murdock nervously awaited her answer. She chuckled, wiping tears from her eyes. "Well, if you see that woman, tell her she better stay away, cause this crazy old pilot is all mine."

He cracked one of his lopsided grins, pulling her against him. "That might cause a bit of a paradox." She laughed into his chest, and they swayed back and forth to unheard music. "She killed herself."

Serenity blinked, pulling away just enough to see his face. "What?"

Murdock looked away shyly. "My mother. When I was five."

All of a sudden, his words about him 'not being enough' to keep her here and the way he had reacted made perfect sense. Serenity couldn't imagine what that would do to a child, especially if he had found her...It made her want to cry. She knew he wouldn't want her pity, so she just hugged him close. "I promise I'll never leave you again, HM. You're worth so much more than I could ever give you, but I'll give you all of me."

He leaned down and kissed her softly, whispering into her ear. "That's more than enough."

* * *

**_I cried...and secretly, I would be gratified if you did too:) Anyway, there are only two chapters left, and if the clouds are right, they should be posted very soon!_**


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews! It's sooo gratifying to see people enjoying my story:) Disclaimer: Don't own A-Team (Or Chicago)**_

Past the taller-than-her rectangle that stood in her way was Serenity's future. Keys jangled in front of her face. "Come on come on come on! I wanna go inside!"

There was a chuckle behind her. "You better hurry up kid, Murdock's gonna go crackers."

"I already have..." The tall man beside her turned around slowly with a maniac grin and flashing eyes.

Serenity smiled softly, snatching up the keys still in front of her and skipping the distance to the black door. The door to Apartment 104. The irony was not lost on her; that was Murdock's room number. The metal slid in the lock cleanly, and she twisted it to the side. Snap. She looked back at Hannibal and Murdock with an excited look.

Hannibal was the furthest away, behind her crazy pilot. He was standing there with a look of kindness on his face, and even though he puffed his cigar casually, she could tell he was a little excited too. Murdock was closer, hands shoved in his pockets. He wore a shirt she had made him a while back; it read_ The Golfball Liberation Army_. He had been so excited, disregarding the fact that it was an amateur job of sewing and patching. On top was a loose button up, and his jacket was slung in the crook of his arm. His goofy smile lit up her heart. His hat was on his head sideways, as he had kept it that way after she had playfully pushed it aside.

She grinned. "Ready?" Murdock's grin widened and he nodded his whole head vigorously. Hannibal took the cigar out of his mouth.

"Open her up, kid."

Without further ado, she pushed the door open. The lights in the apartment were off, but some light filtered through the blinds. She couldn't see much. Although desperately wanting to go forward, Serenity was halted by something in her mind. Something wanted her to stay back, stay away; to just go back to her normal life and throw all of this away. She ignored it, but she still couldn't get her legs to move. A hand snaked it's way into hers, offering a silent strength. She took a deep breath and crossed the threshold into her new home.

She stepped through the dim dust and threw the curtains open with a flourish, letting the vast majority of light through when it hadn't been able to do so before. She gasped, taking in her surroundings. She was standing in the living room, whose walls were painted a soft blue color. Around her was furniture. To be more precise, it was all antique furniture. She loved antiques. There was a soft blue couch with carved wooden accents, and a chair to match. The side table was a light wood with varnished veneer artwork, upon which stood a plain but happy looking white lamp. The thing that really took her breath away was the artwork, though. It was hers. All of her amateur-really amateur-art was displayed on the baby blue walls. She remembered painting at the VA. She remembered Murdock complimenting her work and she remembered herself shaking her head, blushing, and dismissing it. How had they done this?

She turned around, tears in her eyes. Murdock was so ridiculously happy to see they were tears of joy. "How did you guys do this?"

Hannibal smiled. "Well, Wilson Blake had a nice little stash of money in his hidey hole. He was more than happy to donate. The artwork and other things we got from your father's house."

She shook her head slowly. "But...but that money? You guys need it, right?"

Hannibal just shrugged. "We can always take another job, kid. This is important for you." He glanced at the Captain. "It's important for both of you. It'll help you if you run out of meds, too. The VA is just a block away."

Serenity, choked up, covered her face in her hands. "I don't deserve this!" She gasped out between tears. Murdock stepped forward and put a strong hand on her shoulder.

"You do, Ren. You do. More than anyone." He paused, gently prying her fingers from her face and lifting her chin up with his finger. Secretly, Serenity loved it when he did that. Hannibal shifted his weight from one foot to the other; he felt like he was intruding. "You've lost a lot. You never do anything for yourself, and you always help others. Renny, you deserve this. You need this."

Hannibal stepped forward. "The Captain's right, Serenity. The whole team agreed this was the right thing to do." He pulled out another cigar. She didn't know what had happened to the old one.

Serenity smiled. "Ah ah ah! No smoking inside the house, Colonel." She cracked a watery grin.

"You heard the lady." Murdock goofed. Serenity laughed and the Colonel slipped it back in his pocket, chuckling.

"My home, my rules." Serenity blinked. "My home..." She jumped, giving a playful 'yay!' "It's my home!" She spun around, eyes wide. "I can't wait to see the kitchen!" She hurried off to the adjacent room. Hannibal watched her go with a fatherly look in his eyes. Where he once held suspicion, he was now growing a fondness. She had been through her own little hell, came out of it alive, and still had the energy to actually, truthfully, care about others. He was still worried about how her and his Captain might turn out, but they were both adults. They could handle themselves. He hoped.

"Well, I gotta run. B.A. and Face are gonna pick me up at the end of the road soon."

Murdock looked sad. "Aren't you gonna say goodbye to Renny?"

He shook his head. "No time. You can tell her for me. Besides, this is for you two. She can get you back to the VA all right." He nodded to Murdock. "See you soon Captain."

Murdock smiled. "Roger that, Colonel. And...thanks."

Hannibal grinned. "Don't mention it, Murdock." With that, he left.

"Sweet crabapples! I have a dishwasher!" In the living room, Murdock chuckled. He sauntered over to the kitchen, leaning on the door frame. Serenity was puttering around, fiddling with dials, opening cupboards, and inspecting the countertop. "I mean, doing dishes by hand can be relaxing, but after awhile...you know." She gasped. "Hannibal got dishes for me? And cooking utensils? Oh heavens! I have to thank him!" She turned to face Murdock, who had been watching her fondly. "Where is he?"

"He had to go." Said Murdock softly.

"Oh." She hung her head, then shrugged. "That's all right." She donned a coy smile. "Next time you see him, give him a big ol hug for me, will you?"

He smiled. "Of course." They stayed in the kitchen for awhile, Serenity sitting on the counter and Murdock against the doorframe. They didn't have to say anything. Serenity knew what he was thinking. "You know..." She started softly. "...I don't know if this place has a spare bedroom, but if it does, it wouldn't hurt for you to stay over. I mean, you don't really have to go back to the VA tonight."

He perked up a bit. "What about Billy?"

Serenity hopped down. "Oh, he's fine as long as he doesn't scuff up any furniture."

Murdock grinned. "He wont, I promise."

She walked over to him with a bouncy step. "Well, let's go see if there's room for you two." Murdock was so happy to see her like this. Her moods could be slightly unpredictable, and she was more often down than up. But when she was up, boy was she dazzling. It warmed him up, seeing her without the hurt in her eyes.

"Weeell." He drawled, drawing out the word. "I wouldn't have to sleep in the guest room."

She wheeled around, trying to look serious. He winked, and she broke down laughing. "D-Don't ma-ke me s-slap you!" She pushed out between giggles.

"Awww but you wouldn't need to would ya?" He came closer, almost in a fit of laughter himself. "You couldn't resist me!" With that they both doubled over, onto the carpet, clutching their sides.

"Wow!" Serenity coughed out. "The carpet's so soft!" Murdock made eye contact with her, raising his eyebrow. They were silent for a moment, before succumbing to laughter once again.

After awhile, they were laying on the carpet silently, sides aching from laughing. Serenity had reached her arm up behind her head, and Murdock had taken her hand. It was mostly silent, but then, from no where, Murdock started singing. Serenity took in a soft breath. Oh how she loved this man.

_"You know our love was meant to be, The kind of love that lasts forever_

_And I want you here with me, From tonight, until the end of time_

_You should know, everywhere I go, Your always on my mind, in my heart, in my soul_

_Baby, you're the meaning in my life, You're the inspiration! You bring feeling to my life, You're the inspiration!"_

His voice was soft and smooth, and Serenity couldn't help but relax completely into the soft carpet. Her heart slowed it's normally fast pace, and she let out a deep sigh. She closed her eyes, listening only to the satin words coming from behind her.

_"Wanna have you near me, I wanna have you hear me sayin,' No one needs you more than I need you_

_And I know, yes, I know that it's plain to see, We're so in love when we're together_

_Now I know that I need you here with me, From tonight, until the end of time_

_You should know, everywhere I go, You're always on my mind, in my heart, in my soul_

_You're the meaning in my life, You're the inspiration! You bring feeling to my life, You're the inspiration!_

_Wanna have you near me, I wanna have you hear me sayin', "No one needs you more than I need you"_

In the small break in singing, Murdock hummed the background, his voice a deep rumble. When he started singing again, Serenity joined in softly.

_"Wanna have you near me, I wanna have you hear me sayin', No one needs you more than I need you_

_You're the meaning in my life, You're the inspiration! You bring feeling to my life, You're the inspiration!_

_When you love somebody, Till the end of time, When you love somebody, Always on my mind_

_No one needs you more than I, When you love somebody, Till the end of time. When you love somebody, Always on my mind"_

Serenity took a breath, and let it out in a thick, shuddering sigh. "HM?"

"Yea." He whispered.

In a thick voice that held back tears, she whispered back to him. "I don't have words." She squeezed his hand. "I don't have the words to say how much I love you."

He squeezed her hand back. "...I don't either." Silence. "Wait! Wait, I do. I love you more than Billy, and all the golf balls in the world and my ball cap and even more than the sky." There was a shuffling sound behind her and he let go of her hand. After a small moment he appeared above her, looking down at her, so that she saw his head upside down. "Did I ever tell you why I wanted to fly?" Serenity shook her head. "It's cause my momma used to take me star gazin' at night, and I wanted to ride up there and catch a star for her. I promised her I would." Serenity reached up a hand to press against his cheek, and Murdock gently put his hand around hers and pressed it to his face, closing his eyes and drawing in a breath. He suddenly opened them, apparently finding the strength to finish his story. "I love you more than all the stars in the sky, and if I could, I'd bring you each and every one of them."

Serenity smiled and blinked back tears. "Why, that's...the most beautiful thing I've ever heard someone say to me." She bit her lip. "But, you know, I wouldn't really need them, because I have you." She grinned up at him. "You're like all the stars put together, darling." Murdock smiled his goofy smile and jumped up, holding out a hand to her. She grabbed his hand and he pulled her up, steadying her when she got dizzy. "Thank-" Her eyes widened in shock when he kissed her, but closed as she relaxed into him and slipped her arms around his neck. He pulled away from her, studied her flushed face, and then placed his chin on her head. They swayed back and forth slowly, to ghostly music.

Serenity was home. She had a home now, and it wasn't just four walls and a roof. It was love, hope, and blessing in the arms of the man she loved with all her well-worn heart.

**:)** _**Only the Epilogue is left, my dear readers! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! By the by, the song here was 'You're the Inspiration' by Chicago. **_


	7. Epilogue

_**Just a little thing I wanted to tag on, I hope you like it!**_

"No way! How is that even possible?" Gasped Serenity as she was smoked in one of Murdock's video games. "How did you do that?"

He chuckled. "It's all in the hands, sweetheart!" He winked at her and she rolled her eyes.

Serenity crossed her arms. "It's like all you do is stay inside and play video games." She gave him a smile.

He faked a pout. "I'll have you informed that I do go out and engage in other activities."

She pranced up towards him. "Liiiike what, good sir?"

He leaned down and slipped his hands around her waist, a coy smile on his lips. Before he could say any more, the door was slipped open. The two quickly jumped apart and looked to the door, before promptly relaxing.

"Oh, God. I hope I wasn't interrupting?" Face groaned, exasperated.

"Yes!" Murdock grumbled, throwing a pillow at his friend. "Yes, you were!"

"Well, I'm sorry to break you two lovebirds up, but we need you out of here fast, Murdock." Face looked at Serenity. "Actually, you might be able to help me. Murdock's heavy."

"Hey!"

Serenity just laughed. "Of course."

* * *

Minutes later, they came out of the hospital carrying a flailing Murdock, Serenity barely holding in her laughter. She helped him to a point where they couldn't see him anymore and let him go. All three of them walked towards the van. "Actually, Serenity, it might be best if you don't come any closer. Decker is all over us and we don't want him to come down hard on you."

Serenity sighed, not liking what Face said, but understanding it. "All right." She turned to Murdock. "Be careful, all right? I don't want you coming back with holes."

"Or in a casket." Serenity glared at him sternly. He sighed. "I promise I'll try to be careful."

She smiled wearily and kissed his cheek. "You better be." She turned to Peck. "You'll take care of him, right?'

The conman nodded sincerely. "Like always." She nodded to him.

"I'll be home for dinner." Murdock glanced at the Lt, who must've made a face, because he tagged something else on. "Tomorrow."

Serenity smiled and nodded. "Peachy. Have fun, honey!"

Murdock started walking away with Face. "You bet!" Serenity watcher her pilot walk away, praying fervently she'd get to see him again. She knew Hannibal wouldn't let anything happen to him, but she still worried. After a while, she started her walk back to her apartment. She was going to listen to some Chicago.

* * *

"Hey Colonel." Hannibal turned towards the Captain.

"Hey Mur-" He blinked in surprise as the pilot crushed him in a bear hug. "Um...nice to see you too?"

The Captain pulled away, dead serious. "That's from Serenity." With that, he hopped into the van with Face and shut the door. Hannibal blinked and then smiled. Well, when you run with a man like Murdock, you can't stay surprised forever. Something else is just around the corner.

_**THE END**_

_**I am so grateful to everyone who ever reviewed for this story, it means so much to me, and I really enjoyed writing it! I hope it made all you happy! I might post little tidbits of Murdock and Serenity in the future, but I have no idea when that might possible be. I just loved writing for all of you! Toodle doo, for now!**_


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